What is Wife Material?

It’s been said that Armani dresses the wife and Versace dresses the girlfriend (mistress if you don’t mind). To say that Armani dresses the wife is to say that she is conservative, demure, classy, and even exclusive and that the girlfriend, dressed by Versace is flirty, fun, sexy and most definitely not wife material, the good versus the bad girl. The good girl obviously being “wife material” and the bad girl being eligible for any category from mistress, to friend with benefits, to plain old cut buddy.

Of course there are exceptions to this rule. Courtney Love and Pamela Anderson have been married and it was a racy see-through dress that Kate Middleton, a London party girl at the time, wore down a runway that got the attention of Prince William, eventually gaining her the title of Duchess of Cambridge.  But famous people live by a completely different set of rules than us commoners. It is far more likely that a famous or otherwise noteworthy person will be with whomever they please regardless of social norms.

What gives a girl the seemingly permanent title of a “bad girl” on the wrong side of wife material?

The dress that made Kate a British Monarch

Acccording to my recent readings and conversations with men, a woman that is sexy can’t be trusted because she is sure to have a lot of other men after her. Fun girls party a lot, they drink, and maybe even smoke which means that they don’t take care of themselves. Hot women are high maintenance and are usually selfish slobs that you would never want as a mother for your children…And of course, there’s the pride factor. Men want to feel a sense of pride when they’re out with their wife. Pride meaning that she hasn’t slept with anyone they know or are even distantly associated with so her past could be a problem – which is likely the case with a bad girl – and if it is, there’s definitely no future no matter what her present circumstance is. After all, you can’t turn a bad girl good and once a good girl goes bad, she’s gone forever –  right? Sorry Jay-Z, you’re wrong.

That is my problem with the whole concept of good and bad girls and the nonsense that is “wife material”. You can’t turn a hoe into a housewife, but women are expected to accept a man’s past and believe that he has changed and can be a good husband/father. In general, it’s acceptable for men to be in a club every night of their life if they want, dress in whichever fashion they want, date and sleep with as many women as they please and then choose a wife when they are ready to settle down. While a woman on the other hand can’t go from a party girl to a wife or be sexy and loyal to a man at the same time in most men’s minds. It is possible for a woman to party hard and see a lot of men in her early years and then outgrow that stage and be ready to settle down later on just like any man.  Not every woman was born ready to walk down the aisle, some of us mature to that stage and should be judged only by our present actions, not our clothes or our past.

Shot out to Drake for liking a woman with a future and a past. LOL.




About Adia Kamaria
Adia Kamaria, a great lover of history who is proud of her Jamaican heritage, works in marketing and public relations in South Florida. Born in Chicago, IL she grew up in Miramar, Florida. Adia earned a bachelor’s degree in business administration from Florida International University and a master of arts in marketing management from Middlesex University in London. An avid reader and writer, Adia has published two books thus far: the novel Ana’s Magic followed by the memoir Yellow Tulips & Red Buses, which recounts her interesting experiences living and studying in London as a thirty-something single woman.

3 Responses to What is Wife Material?

  1. Mac the Big H says:

    Depends on what that particular man see’s a wife as. A trophy that everyone else wants? In house pussy? Someone to keep an eye on the house and kids while he runs the streets? I personally want a partner, friend and lover who I can fully trust. I was told choosing my wife is the biggest decision i will make. Not my career. I was also told not to persue a serious relationship with a woman who isn’t close to thirty in age, because we men are out here trying girls and girls are trying boys. As we should so we can learn what we really want in a mate. Or at least learn what we don’t want. Deep down inside we all know when it comes to marriage, we want loyalty,monogamy, trust, understanding and all the other things that come together to define true love. Which brings me to the point that both people should have similar values and plans for their lives. Some dudes stay with their girl over ten years and call her wife, but are unwilling to make it official. Also, peoples definition of love are different. I had a girl tell me she loved me, but she also loved her babydaddy who she was cheating on with me. I introduced her to my boys and just like that she loved them too. Lol. At that point in time she damn sure wasn’t wifey material, but who’s to say later on her priorities won’t change. But you can’t ask a man to wife a woman who’s out clubbing 3 days out the week, with her single friends who aren’t looking for the same thing at that time. Just as I can’t claim I want something real, but I’m always in the club with my single friends, who only looking for action. Where do I fit in? I’ll only be tempted and they will definitely encourage me to fuck hoes with them or ridicule me if I decline. So your actions have to match the actions of a wife. U can look beautiful without your ass cheeks hanging out the bottom of them shorts. That is if your beauty is natural and not depending on what you have on. U have to be able to socialize with other men without making me uncomfortable. (Know the limit between socializing and flirting.) Reciprocate, is that how you spell it? Dont demand respect, attention or whatever else if you’re not willing to give those things back. And I have to know it’s till death do us part, cuz women switch out when things take a turn for the worse, financially or otherwise. If I become paraplegic at any point will you care for me or is the the point where your love becomes conditional? Am I willing to be there for her like that? If not, then she’s not wifey.

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